


The Pretzel War

by Zelinith



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime), 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, Crack Crossover, Crossover, Fluff and Crack, I Don't Even Know, Pretzels, What Have I Done
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-30 19:46:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19410145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zelinith/pseuds/Zelinith
Summary: Working at a pretzel shop is essentially fighting a war that never seems to end. At least they will have something to tell their children about when they're older...





	The Pretzel War

**Author's Note:**

> My best friend texted me earlier telling me about her day while working at a pretzel shop and how everything slowly fell into chaos. I was bored and wanted to create something to cheer her up so this story was born using some of her favorites. I am so sorry it became a crack fic...
> 
> Mad, I love ya girl. Hope this brings a smile to your face! :)
> 
> ~Zelinith

Jeongguk was terrified.

_No, no… that’s not the right wording…_

Jeongguk was absolutely petrified.

_Perfect._

Whoever decided to put the shy boy at the cashier had made a mistake. With his large doe-eyes, he seemed nothing more than prey for the incoming customers. It was a big weekend, a major holiday right around the corner, perfect for people who thrived off hosting parties.

He couldn’t complain though, he actually had it easy. Keith and Lance had been in the store since early that morning working on making pretzels for the day. There were a ton of orders to fill and they had been slowly falling behind. When Izuku had walked in, they had practically cried at seeing him.

The green-haired teen hasn’t been seen since.

Yuri was put on phone duty by their manager Victor and had been frantically trying to juggle the incoming calls about orders and questions on what they had and if there were any specials. Victor himself had been busy, driving around orders to their locations. Why their little pretzel shop offered delivery service, Jeongguk would never know.

Already, Jeongguk had had to deal with five bratty children along with their snotty parents, two women who didn’t like the deal they were getting, one old man who the boy swore was senile, and a teenager who didn’t have the right amount of cash on him and tried to be all smart.

It was only 3:17pm.

They opened at 10am.

And they didn’t close until 7pm.

At this point the poor boy was about ready to collapse. Customers were not nice people, well, not all of them at least. The majority were actually very pleasant, but the ones who thought that they were above the workers were the ones who ruined the day.

He knew that his coworkers were all struggling as well. This pretzel shop had very quickly turned into what Jeongguk could only imagine was hell, and he was pretty certain everyone would agree with him.

A sudden chime drew the boy out of his thoughts, and as he saw the approaching couple, he could only take a deep breath and plaster on that fake smile he had perfected.

Here came the second wave…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Midoriya didn’t know what he was thinking when he decided to apply for this job.

Someone should have warned him.

It wasn’t that it was always this bad, but on days like these, he seriously considered why he had ever applied in the first place.

When the teen had walked into work this morning and seen the tears forming in Keith and Lance’s eyes, he knew that it was bad. It wasn’t until they had dragged him into the back room where the equipment was and hugged him, saying how their prayers were answered that he knew it was going to be one hell of a day.

For the past five hours, he had been making pretzels non-stop. He didn’t even know if his sweat was coming out properly anymore due to being caked in so much salt. Izuku hadn’t been able to take a break yet and he was dying of thirst. Lance had taken a break when he had first started his shift, but he was getting pretty dehydrated once more.

Both glared at Keith as he held a water bottle in his hands, sitting in the doorway, a breeze blowing his hair around. Keith, knowing that they were watching, drank the water slowly, making sure to be heard loud and clear.

The other two grumbled, going back to their pretzels, trying to ignore him.

“You know,” Keith began, a smirk growing on his face, “I think this was the last bottle of water that was in the mini fridge. I don’t know if we remembered to stock up on anymore. Ah, it’s a shame for anyone else who is in need of a drink…”

Izuku and Lance froze, the dough dropping from their hands. As if in a trance, both turned around to face Keith, their eyes wide.

“Oh, look!” Keith exclaimed, feigning shock. “I’m almost out of water.”

And that’s all it took for them to pounce.

The three boys tumbled out the back door, fighting over the bottle of water, swearing at one another.

Victor, who had just returned from making a delivery, was shocked by what he saw. But instead of intervening, he quickly made his way around to the front of the store, deciding it wasn’t worth risking his life to try and pass through the back door.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Yuri was going to kill Victor.

Why had he decided that he was in charge of the phone all day?! What had he been thinking?

The man was not very confident when it came to having conversations over the phone, everyone knew that. So why his own boyfriend had told him to take care of this for the day, Yuri would never know. Although, to be completely honest and fair, every one of his coworkers was horrible at talking on the phone.

Guess he just got lucky today.

Setting down the phone, Yuri plopped his head onto his desk, wanting to just curl up on his couch at home with a pork cutlet bowl. He was exhausted and fed up with everything, and if the swears he was hearing from the backroom were anything to go by, his coworkers were struggling as well.

Sighing, the man sat up, stretching his shoulders. A loud pop echoed before he stood up and bent over, trying to make his spine stop screaming. He knew he could have it worse, he could actually have to be facing the customers like Jeongguk had to. That poor boy was probably frightened. Yuri doubted he had ever had to deal with customers like this before.

It had been a while since they had had a day like this for all of them. Last one was at least two months ago, but that didn’t make things better.

Yuri popped his head up when the phone started to ring. Groaning, he plopped back into his seat before picking up the line. Placing the phone against his ear, he was immediately deafened by an angry man, screaming some nonsense about pretzels.

He sighed once more.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jeongguk smiled his bunny smile when he flipped over the sign on the front door, officially closing the shop for the day. They had made it, everyone had managed to survive. It was a miracle.

Turning around, he joined his coworkers on the floor in the center of the room, not caring about whatever had been tracked in by the customers over the day. Plopping down next to Izuku, he untied his apron, throwing it into the pile at the center of their circle.

Together, the six took a moment to relax, happy that their day had finally come to an end.

“You all fought a hard battle today.” Victor said suddenly, sitting up straighter while he adjusted Yuri’s head on his lap. Keith and Lance looked up from where they were peeling salt off their hands.

“It wasn’t easy, but we managed to get everything done. As your manager, I’m proud of you all for what you’ve done today. Who knew running a pretzel shop could be so tiring?”

Keith grunted while Izuku chuckled.

“I swear,” Lance slowly began, clenching his fist, “If I ever have to see a pretzel again I think I’m going to murder someone.”

“So you’re quitting?” Jeongguk asked, a teasing sound to his voice.

“Wha- no, no, no! That’s not what I meant!” Lance’s face turned bright red as he shook his hands frantically. “I just mean that this has been one hell of a day and-”

“I know, I know!” The doe-eyed boy laughed quietly.

“He’s pulling your tail, Lance.” Izuku chuckled as well.

Lance puffed up his cheeks. “That’s not nice! I am not in the right mind after smelling salt and being surrounded by steam all day! I bet none of us are in the right mind after today.”

“Probably.” Yuri murmured sleepily. “But at least I didn’t start off crazy like some people…” Lance chucked the salt that had been sitting in his fist at the other’s face, everyone erupting into laughter around them.

The tension and stress from the day started to lighten from the boy’s shoulders, finding it in them to take a moment and enjoy life. As things quieted down, Jeongguk grinned, looking at everyone else.

“Who wants a pretzel?”


End file.
